I had a skewed expectation on turning 30 that involved the Tim Tam genie, (they gotta bring him back) and some deluded idea that I would wake up wiser.
A few weeks later, and I realise that I have purchased yet another ticket for the merry-go-round.
I may not be sitting on the exact same plastic pony as before, but the surroundings are the same, the crowd waving at me looks all too familiar and the melting ice-cream in my hand is sans sherbet.
“But I thought I would have achieved so much more by now.”
Sure, at 18 I thought by 30 I’d have a sports car, be married, and have traveled the world. Then again at 18, I thought boob tubes were cool and Fatman Scoop‘s, ‘Put your hands up’ was the best party track, ever. Shit changes. Mostly for the better.
I didn’t land a man, invest in property or stocks, rescue a cat from a tree, or return any of the DVD‘s I’ve borrowed from friends in the last few years.
At 30 I hope to continue to get my heart broken, be lied to, max out my credit card, be disappointed, long for more, settle for less, and cry over spilt milk. For I know, as plain as the nose on my face that I will also continue to bend the truth, break hearts, drive too fast, text too soon and use bad grammar.
What I’m trying to say is – I expect to continue being human. I hope for wonderful things to happen but if they don’t, I won’t be hard on myself because I’m old enough to know better, or at the age to have been further along.
It’s entirely possible to get off the merry-go-round and try something racy, even though you may lose your place and have to stand in a cue before getting back to your pony.
It’s also possible to just step back and watch the others go round and round for a time.
The beginning of a new decade is the start of an adventure, not the countdown to winning at life.
Whoever said having it all meant a husband and 2.5 kids?
Maybe having it all is being able to afford to pay rent, eat at your favourite restaurant each week and make time to enrol in guitar lessons?
Set your own standard and leave the judging to the critics.
Let’s meet at the pirate ship in a year and trade stories.